Away View

Suffolk Rules!

2010-10-15T09:19:00.000-07:00

Car Parking: S.P. Rating: (4) There is a car park, but it's small and I now just park in a side street, not ideal but adequate.

Access: S.P. Rating: (4) There is a separate entrance for visitors and staff are friendly, although prices weren't displayed, but an adult and a concession totalled £16, reasonable enough.

Spectating Facilities: S.P. Rating: (6) Donegal Celtic are to be congratulated as they have a small but adequate stand for visitors. On the down side it's at one end of the ground and the dugouts restrict the view up the nearside wing somewhat, but it's a lot better than many aforementioned clubs, who shove visitors into a stand behind the goals.

Toilets: S.P. Rating: (8) Facilities here are excellent, clean, dry and hygienic. The urinal was clean, the cubicles had paper and doors that barred and the sinks had water,soap and driers. It was great to be treated like a human being, other clubs please take note.

Playing Surface: S.P. Rating: (8) The surface at Suffolk Road appeared to be excellent and our players certainly enjoyed playing football on it . All in all Suffolk Road is a credit to the D.C., it's only drawback being the need for visiting fans to be escorted in and out by the P.S.N.I., but it is streets ahead of many other clubs with it's first class facilities!

Crystal Clear!

2010-09-19T03:03:00.000-07:00

Car Parking: S.P. Rating: (8) Crystal Park has a really good car park for a first division club, with a proper surface and clear car parking lines. It is not the biggest, but a lot better laid out than most Premier league clubs, a pat on the back for Banbridge Town and their directors.

Access: S.P. Rating: (4) Only two turnstiles, which with a large crowd could be dangerous, but adequate for a first division club, akin to Stangmore Park and the likes.

Spectating Facilities: S.P. Rating: (5) There is a small stand with two rows of seats which were ignored by most fans who preferred to stand at the back. The view wasn't by any means perfect, as parts of the touchline were out of sight, but compared to many, many, Premier league grounds it was fantastic.

Toilets: S.P. Rating: (9) The toilets about 30 yards from the stand were the best I have been in outside our own at the Showgrounds. They were small but the bar on the cubicle door actually functioned, there was adequate toilet paper, paper towels and sinks with water. There was also lighting, an unusual occurrence for an Irish league ground and they were 'clean', a credit to Banbridge Town and their directors again.

Playing Surface: S.P. Rating: (6) The surface at Crystal Park actually had grass on it (Crusaders and Cliftonville take note), it appeared to be good to play on as our team clearly demonstrated in the early stages of the match and it looked fairly flat, the club and their directors are to commended (again),on upholding the standards we all love, using a grass surface, sure it's the way football should be played!

Crude Crues!

2010-05-04T10:51:00.000-07:00

Car Parking: S.P. Rating: (1) This is just ridiculous, there's no room for a car park, I shudder to think what it'd be like if there was a big crowd, roll on their new stadium I say!

Access: S.P. Rating: (4) Getting in to the ground is adequate, but a big crowd is not catered for as the turnstiles are located on the busy Shore Road, an accident waiting to happen. .

Spectating Facilities: S.P. Rating: (2) Yes it's pretty basic at Seaview, standing on the terrace you can't see all the pitch, there's not even a good atmosphere any more as there's a no-man's land between both sets of fans.

Toilets: S.P. Rating: (1) The toilets here were 'minging', I purposely didn't linger in there as the stench was something else. This sort of thing should be condemned.

Playing Surface: S.P. Rating: (2) The Crues have installed a plastic pitch, if it was level it might be reasonable but it's up and down like see-saw. The players say it's almost impossible to keep their footing on it and as if to emphasis how unsuitable it is, the Crues have developed into a long ball team. To the Crues directors I say forget about the money to be made from renting out the ground, let's get back to nature, let's roll out the grass!

Marsh Pride?

2010-05-04T10:33:00.000-07:00

Car Parking: S.P. Rating: (6) Strangely one of the best, but the car park is good, has been recently surfaced but on the down side is fairly small, though there is ample spaces on the road.

Access: S.P. Rating: (6) We are usually at Newry fairly early (Omar usually drives and allows two hours just in case), so I cannot really comment on the ease of access if there was a substantial crowd. On our visit this time we think there was only about 16 United fans and access was easy.

Spectating Facilities: S.P. Rating: (2) This is yet another ground where the viewing facilities have gone down the plughole. The old stand has been condemned and in their wisdom the Newryites have copied popular tradition and built a new one behind the goals, rubbish, rubbish, rubbish! If that's not bad enough, they still charge £10 admission, expensive and crap!

Toilets: S.P. Rating: (2) The toilets are pretty basic, no water in the taps, no light, do they think we're all savages!

Playing Surface: S.P. Rating: (4) The surface is okay, well at least it's grass, like most grounds it could do with a roller run over it, but then again one assumes it's not called the Marshes for nothing, maybe the roller would disappear!

Dead End1

2010-01-03T08:51:00.000-08:00

Car Parking: S.P. Rating: (2) Poor I'd have to say, I usually park on the road as like too many grounds there's no visitor's car park. My advice is get there early.

Access: S.P. Rating: (2) This is not good as both home and visiting fans enter and exit at the same place. The admission charges are still displayed as for last year when the Ports were in the First division.

Spectating Facilities: S.P. Rating: (1) I'm reluctantly giving a (1) rating, as this is by far the worst place I have ever attempted to watch a game from. I say attempted, which is probably an exaggeration as it was impossible to discern the majority of the play. There we were in a stand (quite a good stand), which might as well have been at Mourneview Park as it was at least 100 yards behind the goals. I ended up standing at the railing and still I could see practically sweet F.A.. When are the authorities going to wise up realise they're driving fans away from football with their pathetic spectating facilities.

Toilets: S.P. Rating: (0) My first ever zero and well merited. The one cubicle in use was blocked (unusable) and the wash basin tap wouldn't turn on and as for lighting, forget about it, bring back the wall, at least we knew what to expect with it.

Playing Surface: S.P. Rating: (4) I'm giving this a 4, but in reality it could've been the 'best' or 'worst' as I could only vouch for about 20 yards from my jaundiced viewpoint.

Nearly There!

2009-11-11T14:10:00.000-08:00

Car Parking: S.P. Rating: (2) This is where Glenavon fall down, I have never found my way into their car park. Maybe that's my fault, but somehow I doubt it, I usually have to find on street parking. If I'm early (two thirtish), I can usually get a spot on the road outside the ground, probably on the ample footpath, if arriving later it's a matter of parking somewhere on the main road.

Access: S.P. Rating: (4) Like lots of other grounds Glenavon have both sets of supporters entering by adjacent turnstiles (supposedly they are going to have separate entrances in the near future) . On the plus side visitors are segregated from home fans once inside, but the turnstiles are akin to trying on clothes that are too small, breathtaking.

Spectating Facilities: S.P. Rating: (6) This is without doubt one of the best away grounds for seeing the action. From the middle of the stand it's not possible to see all of the touchlines as the stand is too close but it's pretty good. There's is a wee bit of a security worry as it's possible to get access onto the pitch, a worry for players and fans alike.

Toilets: S.P. Rating: (6) The toilets at Lurgan are among the best, not as good as Windsor Park, but at least 'they' were open. The building itself is quite cold but then again who wants to hang around in those places (only perverts), but they fulfil their need adequately.

Playing Surface: S.P. Rating: (6) The pitch is fairly good but there appears to be a low part running close to the centre for about 20 yards. If I had to hazard a guess I'd say this was a drainage ditch which had sunk, but all in all the surface appears to be good and is conducive to good football as both teams proved on the day.

Not Astute!

2009-11-08T07:03:00.000-08:00

Car Parking: S.P. Rating: (2 ) Yes there is a car park and for the first time in all my visits to Drumaho I actually managed to get parking in it, at all other times I have been refused entry. Maybe the secret is to drive up to the gate as if you're a regular, as I did on this occasion, otherwise there is only about ten spaces on the road, nowhere near enough for even our wee crowd of travelling fans.

Access: S.P. Rating: ( 6) Access is fine but there seems to be only one turnstile, but on the plus side staff are courteous, a lot better than some I could mention (Linfield please take note).

Spectating Facilities: S.P. Rating: ( 4) Institute's ground looks as if it should be okay as there is a small stand for visiting fans. Unfortunately they decided to 'plonk' two dugouts on that side and as a result it's impossible to see about 20% of the pitch.

Toilets: S.P. Rating: ( 2) Like most clubs this is where Institute fall down, there's only one cubicle, there's no light in it no paper and no way of securing the door. This toilet remains well short of the 20th century, never mind the 21st. I realise some fans do sometimes behave like animals (one of our fans actually brought a glass bottle into the ground), but the remainder of us deserve, nay demand something better.

Playing Surface: S.P. Rating: ( 4) I'm giving the surface a (4) as it was in fair nick even with all the rain we've had recently, but like the majority of Irish league grounds it hasn't had a roller for quite a considerable time. Is there a new F.I.F.A. rule that says you can't use a roller on your ground once the season has kicked off? That of course is a rhetorical question, as it's just yet another example of clubs blind economism, save a little money and get 2nd rate football.

Footnote: Institute's ground is adequate but it's basically a first division ground and need some drastic updating!

Hick Town!

2009-10-11T07:17:00.000-07:00

Car Parking: S.P. Rating: (2) On street is the only parking I've ever found at Solitude. I now come in from Westland Road and park in an adjoining street. The first time I did this a resident asked me to not park in front of his house as he was taking his 'handicapped' mother out and for some reason best known to himself it was easier done from the street, rather than his 'ample' driveway. I agreed under protest, but did it as I didn't want a scrape or other disfigurement on my car. So parking on the street at Solitude is in my opinion, less than ideal.

Access: S.P. Rating: (2) Solitude is not the best place to get into or out of as it is approached down a narrow residential street and leaves one feeling rather vulnerable if the natives should get restless. The turnstiles are okay and operators are civil and entrance is usually fairly easy.

Spectating Facilities: S.P. Rating: (4) One of the the Sky Blue Sports teams 'pet hates' is when we fans are stuck behind the goalposts at one end of the ground. Solitude is such a ground, as is Portadown (or was the last time I was there) and the home of the 'scum' to name but three. If like the old days we were allowed to change ends, at least that would be something, but alas we must watch our teams attacking efforts from a long distance for at least 45 mins. As such the Solitude stand rates a poor, as well it's pretty low and if you're behind the nets it's like being behind the wire.

Toilets: S.P. Rating: (2) Although a vast improvement on their old portaloo the gents toilet at solitude leave a lot to be desired. I could find nowhere to wash my hands and in the cubicle has no peg to hang your coat. Modernisation and basic hygiene obviously hasn't reached North Belfast yet.

Playing Surface: S.P. Rating: (4) The pitch has improved drastically at Solitude but it somehow appears to be out of kilter as if its narrower on one side, or is that an optical illusion. One thing they are to be commended upon is the floodlights, they are excellent.

Poor Park!

2009-10-10T01:53:00.000-07:00

Car Parking: S.P. Rating: (4), I have never attempted to park in the 'Park', preferring to take a chance on the street which so far has worked out okay, so I have to give them a decent mark on this occasion. On the down side the area seems to be a bit small and both sets of fans can exit through the area, so it's not ideal, maybe a disaster waiting to happen.

Access: S.P. Rating: (4) The turnstiles at the 'home' of the I.F.A. are quite literally a nightmare, especially for us men and/or women with the 'fuller figure'. I admit I am a little claustrophobic and these turnstiles scare me as I think they're going to jam with me in it. Also they rarely, in fact never to be truthful, have more than two 'stiles in operation, a poor show for allegedly our top stadium.

Spectating Facilities: S.P. Rating: (4) At Windsor we have an unrestricted view but for some reason there were two cameramen blocking our unrestricted view of the proceedings. I wish clubs would learn the salutary lesson, that the 'paying punter' is the most important person, everything else is secondary (if these cameramen were from Sky Blue TV I apologise unreservedly). Sky blue TV I would add is not part of Sky Blue Sport, in fact at the moment it appears to be defunct, but I digress.

Toilets: S.P. Rating: (6) The toilets at the 'Park' are quite good as befits our International stadium, unfortunately when United were there they forgot to open them. Although they were opened eventually, what a relief that was.

Playing Surface: S.P. Rating: (4) The pitch at Windsor is to put it mildly is poor, the groundsman has to come on at halftime and replace the surface that has been damaged by the players studs. Surely with all the money raked in by Linfield (allegedly £250,000, but probably lots more and that's just from the I.F.A.), the least we can expect is a level playing field. In fact it's the only 'level playing field' we can hope to get, but even here it looks like we're going to be disappointed.

New (Grovesnor) Dump!

2009-10-04T15:41:00.000-07:00

Car parking: S.P. rating: 3. Used to be the best ground for car parking, now it’s a joke. For some reason we’re not allowed round the back of the ground anymore, probably their version of progress.

Ease of access: S.P. rating: 3. Access is okay but there appears to be only two turnstiles and when we played there this season only one was operating, on the night that was okay, but if there had been a big crowd, I shudder to think what the consequences could have been.

Spectating facilities: S.P rating: 2. Spectating wise this ground is only outdone by Coleraine for inadequate facilities for us punters. To sit in the Grandstand is to view the action from a long distance and to stand under the cover at the far side is a poor view as the ground is beyond the greyhound track. On the plus side it’s now possible to stand beside the track as they’ve put up a boundary fence

Toilets: S.P. rating: 1. Only Porta-loos which is only slightly better than nothing.

Playing surface: S.P. rating: 4. Hard to rate this surface as to the naked eye it looks okay, but it suits the home teams type of play, ‘boot it up the field’ and hope it falls to a home player, rarely is there ever a lot of football played on it.

Oval Hovel!

2009-09-15T07:45:00.000-07:00

Car parking, S.P. rating: (1), What car parking, there is no car parking at the Oval, except for the privileged few. For the rest of us it’s ‘on street’ parking and if you’re not there early, ‘god help you’, you’ll have a 3 mile camel hike!

Ease of access: S.P. rating: (5), There are plenty of turnstiles, but both home and visiting fans must use them which can cause a bit of a commotion. They are a wee bit tight for people with the fuller figure (fat love children), but not too bad. Staffs are civil but not outwardly friendly, just doing their job.

Spectating facilities: S.P rating: (3), The view from the visitors stand (terracing with seats best describes it), is not the best as there are posts which obstruct your vision and means you miss about 10% of the action. The other alternative is to stand behind the goal, but that in my opinion is a waste of time as what happens at the other end of the pitch is a mystery.

Toilets: S.P. rating: (2), Toilet facilities have improved vastly at the venue, but there are no hand-washing facilities, so best to carry a couple of tissues or live with the alternative!

Playing surface: S.P. rating: (7), One of the better surfaces (if not the best), although it floods fairly easily. Looks to have a slight slope from the city end to the Sydenham end or is that an optical illusion. Maybe it’s just my opinion but I think our team likes playing on it.

Scum Slum!

2009-08-30T07:54:00.000-07:00

Car parking, S.P. rating 1. What car parking? There is no car parking, except on the home side and believe you me you don't want to be on that part of the ground either before or after the game. Therefore you have to take a chance parking on the street and that's no picnic either as you could find yourself half a mile from the ground very easily.

Ease of access: S.P. rating 4. Despite the long walk from the Industrial Estate [reminiscent of the infamous hen-run at the Oval], when one gets there getting into the ground is no great difficulty. On the down side there were only two turnstiles and I wonder how they would cope with a large crowd of fans arriving at the same time. Staff were courteous to the point of being friendly.

Spectating facilities: S.P. rating 2. This is a huge bone of contention with United fans. You either pay £10 and sit in the stand where the view isn't great, building is too low and too far away from the action or you pay £8 and stand behind the goals where the view is pathetic to put it mildly. Oh for the good old days when we had access to the terracing opposite the stand and the fans brought a bit of atmosphere to the whole thing.

Toilets: S.P. rating 5. I'm giving them a generous mark here maybe as I didn't inspect them fully, just nipped in for a quick slash before the game and unhygenically didn't wash my hands after [well I'm a bachelor at heart, ain't I], so I can't comment on the had-washing facilities.

Playing surface: S.P. rating 5. Again I'm probably being generous here, but there always seems to be good football played here, well when the Sky Blues are there anyway. One thing that always puzzled me was why it was hard to tell when the ball was out of play along the touch lines? I have no answer for this personally, but it was always a strange anomaly associated with the home of the Scum. There also appears to be a slope from the centre of the pitch to the 'home' goal, probably an optical illusion [just like the Coleraine income tax bill].

Stangmore Stinks!

2009-08-16T02:20:00.000-07:00

Car Parking: S.P. rating 3, Yes there is car parking, but there is not adequate car parking, there are no definitions of where to park, there is a steward in attendance but cars still park 'willy nilly' and I doubt if it holds more than 100 cars. If you want to use the car park get there early. Exiting the car park is no picnic either, as they tend to just open the one gate. The car park to my mind is too close to the ground, danger of cars being damaged by footballs.

Ground Access: S.P. rating 2, Turnstiles are antiquated, there are only two, so if there was a huge influx of fans they couldn't cope, staff are fine but not too courteous and none too helpful either.

Spectating Views: S.P. rating 4, If you are not at the front you can't see the touch lines and even then you have to lean out, there is no segregation which could lead to trouble although the banter is usually good natured, but I think it's a disaster waiting to happen. The stand is pathetic, they still think they're an intermediate club, it's time they got their act together, this is the 21st century after all.

Toilet Facilities: S.P. rating 5, The toilets for some reason are at least a 100 yards from the entrance, though small they were clean, but had the paper towels in upside down, probably a money saving exercise.

Playing Surface: S.P. rating 6, The much vaunted playing surface at Stangmore fails in my opinion badly due to the slope from the social club end to the other (I have no name for this end as yet), otherwise it's fair but seemed rather bouncy and in need of a roller, but for an Intermediate league club, fairly good.